In the words of American musician Tom Waits in ‘Underground’: “They’re alive, they’re awake / while the rest of the world is asleep.” The year is 1982. Cold War tensions worsen by the minute, as the Soviet Union’s distrust with America and its allies is at an all time high. To the horror of the cold country, NATO has become increasingly secretive and suspicious, raising eyebrows and concerns. Last night, 15 members of the Soviet Union government convened late in the night to address a crisis: NATO’s attempt at nuclear warfare under the guise of ‘war games’. This group included representatives of the Politburo, Communist Party, and other government officials. A member of The Working Paper had the opportunity to sit in on the session, speaking on behalf of the General Secretary of the Community Party: Yuri Andropov. Together, this group offered some opening remarks, and immediately jumped into writing solutions into policies. Among the directives written, the room was able to successfully mobilize troops within West Germany and spread their influence into the United States. The member of the press recollects her experience: “It was fast,” she said. “Every directive passed without question or debate, so it felt like a hivemind, almost. We just agreed on everything, making it feel more like a directive-writing-spree.” Every time that the group would break for an unmoderated caucus, groups would form en masse to discuss a topic, write a note, and submit a paper in less than 5 minutes. This “Midnight Crisis”, as one may call it, bolstered quick solutions–even if not always successful.

Reported on by IPC Delegate Maco Jeleniewski

The Midnight Crisis focused on the topic, “Cold War Gone Hot,” and delegates did not shy away when told, “the backroom will be a sandbox,” even with the committee progressing at a, “breakneck pace.”

The Russian Cabinet initially reacted to NATO's war games near Soviet territory and PSYOPs, through the development of espionage insects, a press release and propaganda aimed at uniting the Soviet people, and the assassination of the beloved Princess of Wales. Grigory Romanov was left speechless calling the assassination, “the utmost horrible tragedy,” and telling a reporter, “it was an unjustly murder.” Although the assassin had a Russian accent most cabinet members had very little suspicion as to who had actually hired him. In the wake of Princess Diana’s death there was very little time to grieve with NATO deploying missiles to West Germany that could reach Russian territory within 6 minutes. There was some talk of encroaching into additional territories on the edges of the Iron Curtain, but that was sidetracked by the assassination of US President, Ronald Reagan. In a rather ironic fashion two assassins actually showed up to complete the job. Reagan was succeeded by his Vice President, George H.W. Bush. In response to the recent development, the directive, “Games, Games, Games,” was passed to disguise a mass mobilization along the Western border of the USSR calling it, “a War Game.” Further escalating the tensions, the US began to position offensive weapons in West Germany, Turkey, Italy, and Alaska, all pointed at the USSR. The general consensus amongst the cabinet was to progress to war and mobilize as much as possible. The war plans were interrupted by the announcement that there had been an assassination attempt on President Bush that had further provoked the Americans. Following this announcement, the cabinet proceeded to unanimously pass seven directives one after the other. These consisted of increases in defense, a press release blaming Bush for the death of Princess Diana, and many more protocols to prepare for war.

The cabinet was then notified that the missiles in West Germany were launched and the cabinet had a mere six minutes to respond. Screams of, “Nukes!” could be heard from the chambers as the Soviets wrote their final directive ever, “Nuke the Floor.” While waiting for the nuclear missiles to destroy both nations, Konstantin Chernenko told a reporter, “We’re all equal when we’re burning in hell together.”

Reported on by IPC Delegate Maggie de la Fuente